Homage to Mindy:Happy 40th Birthday

July 28th Would be Mindy’s 40th Birthday

Memories of Mindy:

From Sister Heidi

  • As a teenager, Mindy was admiring a Michael Jackson poster up on her wall when I walked into her room. I’m not quite sure of her reasoning; a crush or to get a reaction out of me, but she leaned in and gave the paper MJ a kiss! Whatever her reasoning was, I remember how it made me feel; my sister was daring and maybe just a little kooky. So a few years later a friend and I were watching the movie Newsies. From Mindy’s inspiration, I went up to the TV and gave the guy I had a crush on, a big kiss. My friend’s reaction didn’t disappoint!
  • I’ll use my thumb or big toe as a microphone and my girls will smile when I try to get them to talk into it. It makes me smile because Mindy created the ‘microphone’ and did the same thing to me.
  • We would have leg wars and of course she would always win.
  • Mindy loved scary movies and ghost stories. Consequently, as children she loved to scare me and always made me turn out the last light in a room.
  • I have fond memories of wearing our pajamas while eating our dinner on TV trays and watching the Muppets.
  • When we gave back tickles she made me do her first then pretended to fall a sleep.
  • The fall before Mindy died, my dog got lost. Mindy gave me advice and comfort. She went with me to animal shelters in hopes to find him.
  • As little girls, Mindy had a Benji the dog sleeping bag while I had a Snoopy the dog. We would have sleepovers at our grandparent’s and lay on the floor by their fire.
  • She was good at ice-skating, water and snow skiing. She took dance and piano. She was a Girl Scout and seminary president. She went to girls’ camp and youth conference as a young woman in the LDS church.
  • She met the LDS prophet, Spender W. Kimball

From Brother Austin
“Mindy and I have quite a few years between us; so as a kid, she and I didn’t have the most connected relationship. Nevertheless, I have nothing but positive memories of her. She was always laughing and smiling. Her light-heartedness made me feel very comfortable with her. Although I know she had her struggles, she seemed to remain positive. The night I got set apart as a missionary, I was pleasantly surprised to hear her remarks. That night I felt our relationship grow stronger. It was unfortunate that was the last time I saw her. As I set out on my adventure, I once again was pleasantly surprised to see how often she communicated with me. In all honesty, she wrote me the most out of anyone else. Without fail, I got a letter in the mail from her every week. I loved hearing from her, she was so positive about what she was doing. She was great at telling me about the small things in life, which was exactly what I wanted to hear. I wanted to know all the details about home. As she continued to write me letters, our relationship grew more than ever before. She continually bore her testimony to me, and told me about the positive changes she was making. I was so proud of her.

Then one morning while I was in my companionship study in Cairns Australia, I got a phone call from the Mission President. As I looked down at the phone, my heart began to race. It is usually not a good thing when the President calls. I went into another room to get some privacy from the three other Elders in the apartment. Being at a loss of words, the call ended quickly. As I laid on the floor in tears, I looked over in the mirror seeing myself sob. Then a peaceful feeling came over me. I thought to myself, If Mindy saw me right now, she would tell me to cut it out and get back to work. That’s exactly what I did. To this day, that thought continues to bring me peace with where she is.

Mindy has inspired me on many levels. She had so much love for people. I wish she could have been given better opportunities in life, because that’s exactly what she deserved. I love her so much, and I am thankful our relationship got much stronger in the last 6 months of her life.”

Excerpts From Talks Given at Mindy’s Funeral:

Mother, Bev’s
I am glad to honor my daughter Mindy today by expressing deep gratitude to her for being her mother. She was kind and patient and so full of love for everyone she came in contact with. I will never forget when she was born. I had an undeniable sense that many loved ones from beyond the veil had come to bid her farewell. They were there and I knew it. I know she was important to many people who loved her very much. I sensed that very strongly. I knew she had been valiant in the preexistence and that I was lucky to  be given such a special child. She was a tender and  kind child. Mindy loved anyone who would spend time with her. I am glad the last years of her life I spent a great deal of my time with her. She would often apologize to me and  say “ Mom, I am sorry for taking so much of your time”.  I always  told her ‘ I love the time that  I spend with you and I always will.’ Having a dad was really important to Mindy. I overheard her talking to a friend right after Alan and I got married. Mindy was beaming that she could tell her friends, “I have a dad  now.”  Everyone knows she loved dogs and loved grooming them. She enjoyed helping dogs feel good about themselves and it brought her much joy. I look forward to the bright day when I see Mindy face to face again. Mindy is in never ending peace and love . She will continue on growing brighter and stronger in her progression; I am happy for her. I pray we will all look forward to do good each day, be kind to each other, and take time for each other.

Father, Alan’s
It’s been mentioned that when Bev and I got married, Mindy was happy to have a dad. I was equally happy to have a family. I have been asked to talk about Mindy’s relationship with her brothers. Brady recently bought something that he had wanted for some time. Within a minute or two after coming home with the purchase, he was talking to Mindy on the phone about it. She was so proud of her brothers and their accomplishments. We called Austin, who is serving an LDS mission in Australia, the day Mindy passed away. When we talked to Austin, he bore testimony of the Plan of Salvation and Eternal Life. As soon as Austin left on his mission, Mindy was so excited. She wrote to him weekly and sometimes more often than that. She had his picture beside her bed and his missionary picture in her cupboard where she could see it. When we went to Mindy’s house, there was a stack of handwritten letters from her Missionary brother, whom she loved very much and was so proud of him. She waited for his emails every Sunday night. She would call us if the email had not been forwarded to her by 10:00 pm. She loved her Heavenly Father. Austin told us of Mindy’s testimony she bore to him. Mindy is a daughter whom I love very much. She has many of her mother’s qualities. We know that Mindy is in the hands of He that heals each of us and loves us more than we can comprehend. 

 Brother-in-Law, Jake’s

The thing that stands out the most to me when I think about Mindy is her sense of humor. She was the first to tell a joke, or drop a wise crack. Her distinctive laugh confirmed the joke had just been delivered….even if she was the only one laughing. That’s something my wife and her sister have in common; the ability to laugh at their own jokes. When I really step back and think about that, I realize what a gift it is. Mindy found joy in life because she was able to look at it with a smile and an optimistic attitude. Even when things weren’t going so well, she wouldn’t complain much—if at all—and she would shrug it off. Mindy put others first and would have a defense for another person, even if that person wasn’t her favorite. She was quick to see all sides of the story and to let that side be seen to others, even if it was in conflict with her. She found the good in people and would quickly provide the benefit of the doubt. There weren’t many times I saw Mindy in an argument, in fact I don’t really recall any time I saw her in one. I’m thankful for the friendship Mindy shared with her siblings. She was (at least as long as I knew her) kind to Heidi and I. We felt a great sense of friendship and love from her.

Poem read with the eulogy

Poem read with the eulogy


Homage to Mindy: Johnny Cash

Mindy Liked Listening to 80’s Rock and Country

Ring of Fire

When Mindy died I ‘fell into a ring of fire and as I fell, the flames went higher.’ Scriptures speak of a refiner’s fire. The word Refiner in the bible dictionary states, “A man who separates the precious metals from the dross with which in nature they are usually found mixed. Part of the process consists in the application of great heat, in order to bring the mass into a fluid state, hence the term “refiner’s fire.” Christ is the great Refiner.” In the book of Isaiah chapter one, verse twenty five says, “And I will turn my hand upon thee, and purely purge away thy dross, and take away all thy tin.”  It felt like the details surrounding Mindy’s death planted dross inside my heart and I had to choose whether to let it morph or let Christ refine me.

Little Magic Glasses

Part of grieving was putting the ‘magic glasses’ inside a box and knowing how to seal it with a lock. I realized when Mindy was gone my vision of the future had her in it. Birthdays and holidays remind me of old expectations. The year following her death, I had to force myself to make friends. It felt pointless because the one friend I wanted was gone. Missing out on a tangible relationship with Mindy creates a negative space. But this space is filled with my three little girls. My relationship with Ayzia, Eden and Ivy doesn’t replace the one I have with Mindy, but I certainly have found a new kind of glasses.

Grandfather’s Clock

‘Down a long dusty road there’s a house that nobody lives in anymore. Inside the house is a grandfather clock that’s silent and covered with spider webs’.  I feel people leave this earth too early. It’s not always their time to die or Heavenly Father needs them on the other side. I’m so glad Mindy had family like my dad Mike and grandpa Garth to greet her on the other side when she passed. My grandpa Thomas’ clock stopped about 6 months before Mindy’s and was still clear of cobwebs. It seems logical he was also a great asset in helping her transition sides.

One and One Make’s Two

There was a period where the loss of Mindy was paramount and felt like a part of myself was lost. Ten years of my upbringing  consisted of  ‘one and one made two’. So when she was gone, ‘the number one wasn’t my favorite number cause one means only me and there’s no you.’ I took much comfort in having three other siblings because, ‘Everyone needs somebody to share with. To love and help and care for through and through’. It’s curious how relationships don’t really end when people die. They keep evolving either through memories or by feeling their spirit. The relationship may feel at times one dimensional, but that is part of the set-backs of mortal existence.

I’ve Got Jesus in My Soul

‘I’ve got Jesus in my soul, it’s the only way I know’. I’m glad Jesus was my guide through life up until Mindy’s death, because He helped me handle the adversity. Without Him my dross would have kept decrepitating, never reaching its refined state. Some heavy questions were on my mind, and the scriptures were able to answer those. Much of my scripture reading during this time was about Heavenly Father’s role of being just and Jesus Christ’s being mercy. Both roles work together with the atonement. I feel it was faith that made it possible for our family to remain close.


Mindy was delicate with the words she put on paper and was her preferred way of communicating. There are journals of hers that went missing after she died. Maybe by mentioning that her family would be grateful for their return, the universe will help bring them to us. If you feel inclined to add upon her character or your feelings; leaving a comment it’s graciously welcomed.